As much as I love my Mexican culture and heritage now, and embrace it now, I definitely did not for a period.
I had struggled with being the color that I am… which for disclosure, I’m barely tan. Specifically, when I moved to Suffolk County, New York – one of the most divisive and affluent places I can be in the country (after 2016) from East Side Las Vegas -- where I never questioned my existence or the meaning of my skin color. Ni de qui ni de alla.
In Latinx/Chicanx culture, anti-blackness runs strong. It’s very problematic and backwards. White supremacy lives well through other marginalized groups and its members. It’s almost as if black is the worst thing you can be.
There are Euro-centric Mexicans
There are Afro-centric Mexicans.
And this is true for all Latinxs.
And there is the added layer of Mexican hegemony which is its own massive issue.
Oh yes. Can’t forget the guilt and strange feelings that conflicted with my religious upbringing.
There is no choice for me but to embrace my roots given the political climate though. Yes, I grew wings, but I am still that ESLV girl who craves dry air, my mom, but most importantly, mine and the community’s well-being.
I urge you to embrace who you are. And if you aren’t using your identity to empower others, start.